It is Christmas Eve. I long all year for the holiday season to be upon us, and the little girl trapped within me can’t wait, but yet the closer we get to the big 2-5 ‘o December the more I’m flummoxed by conflicting emotions. I want it to be here, but I don’t WANT it to end!! The smells (the seasonal-Christmasy ones, not the ones that come from Kayliana’s diaper presents), the lights, the music, AHHHHhhh, the music…I just get so sad when it’s done! Mike always gives me a hard time because every year, pretty much the moment Halloween wraps up, I’m ready to go Christmas-crazy (but I do hold off...as long as possible…usually until Thanksgiving). Mike acts like I’m hurting Thanksgiving’s feelings or something by not being more ‘into it.’ Maybe I would be more into November and Thanksgiving if it was as awesome and magical as December and Christmas. Maybe if there were Thanksgiving carols. Maybe the Thanksgiving marketing department ought to get on that. But, sorry, nothing can compare to the magical anticipation of this season. Nothing.

I’m excited to watch the children Christmas morning – to see Zach’s face when he sees the Playmobil Knight Castle (that he’s wanted for a year – every since best buddy Joshua got his for Christmas last year); Matthew will surely be surprised by the new bike that he didn’t ask for but really needs (since his knees practically bump his chin while riding his little one). I’m very proud, I might add, that I got both of those items second hand and they’re in great condition. We’re definitely on a tighter budget this year, but we will still have way more than most families and we’re so blessed. And of course, the best present of all will very possibly be wearing a bow on her head, and she may just end up under the tree for a while so we can all admire her. She’s smiling more and starting to coo a bit and I know that she – along with the boys – will help me get through the post-Christmas hum-bugs. But don’t judge me if I do just leave up the decorations a bit longer than is socially acceptable. And I might still be listening to Christmas music in April. And then for a week in July. And then again next October (but don’t tell Mike).

Merry Christmas!