What was I thinking?! How on Earth did I manage not to realize that if it all happened at once, suddenly my life would loose so very much of its’ meaning? On the same day that I had my last ever therapy session (well, at least last insurance-covered session for 2007), I had to also sadly say adieu to So You Think You Can Dance (SYTYCD) – only, possibly THE BEST reality TV show of all time which has become my best friend come Wednesday and Thursday evenings. So, my show and my therapy come crashing to an end on the same day. Then, while still reeling from the loss of those two vital aspects of my existence, an even worse reality comes to fruition. We finished Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Book 7. The end of the series. The end of an era. How, I ask you, how will I get through this?

Mike and I have read all of the Harry Potter books out loud together. We’ve read them since we were dating. We read one of the books driving to Spokane to stay with Mike’s family at the lake house. We read another one the night that we got stuck on Snoqualimie Pass in the snow storm. We had to pee in the woods next to the highway and slept in the car until 4am – reading the book outloud to keep our minds off how cold we were. We finished book 4 the week after our wedding, when we were supposed to be on our Honeymoon but instead were lying low due to Mike’s cancer. We read book 5, the summer that I was pregnant with Matthew. Mike read the entire book out loud – we finished it in a week. I didn’t read much because in-utero Matthew was pushing on my lungs and diaphragm so much I couldn’t get a deep breath. Mike read book 6 to me in the evenings while I painted the family room downstairs. And just two nights ago, we finished the series. Mike read while I painted doorframes and doors. He read and read and read. And then it was done. I don’t know how I’ll move on.

OK, but I’ll manage. I don’t have a choice – these boys keep me busy, keep my mind off of the lack of therapy, the lack of SYTYCD, the lack of Potter.

I discovered Zachary up to an interesting activity the other day. I’d left the room (the nerve! Using the restroom! What was I thinking?) and came back find that Zachary had climbed up on to the dining room table and was typing some additional comments into an email I’d been writing. I couldn’t help but keep his added note. I’m sure my friend Kate enjoyed hearing from him.

On Saturday, we went to dinner at our friends Jason and Rebecca’s house. Matthew and Joshua (2 ½) were happily playing downstairs. Rebecca had gone into the kitchen and wondered why she could hear them so well through the window. We figured it was because a window was open downstairs and their gleeful voices were carrying up to us. After a bit, I decided I better go check on them. When I got downstairs, Matthew and Joshua were no where to be found. The slider door to the backyard was open and as I approached, I could hear the hysterical laughter of the boys from outside. Matthew and Joshua had somehow managed to get the slider open – a really old, heavy LOCKED door that takes a VERY strong adult to open, mind you. They then proceeded to turn on the hose and were spraying each other and were head-to-toe completely drenched. Saturday was rainy, cold and overcast. When I came upon the boys and their activity, Matthew was happily squirting Joshua who was giggling through chattering teeth and lips that were turning blue with cold. I tried to keep my laughter hidden while Rebecca and I both firmly chastised the boys for their behavior. Matthew, who was practically holding the hose practically down his pants and with water running down his legs said, “But Joshua sprayed me. That’s how I got so wet.” Right.

Thankfully, Matthew and Joshua stayed indoors and dry today at Matthew’s (early) Birthday Play Date. For some reason, I’m in denial and just can’t admit that it really was a Birthday party. I had already scheduled our little play group to come over and figured – well, what the heck! We’ll just turn it into a little birthday play date celebration. We had five mommies, five little boys, two toddlers, and two infants. I suppose that was a party.

Matthew and I even decorated the dining room with pictures of John Deeres and Fire Trucks (the theme for this non-birthday party-birthday celebration play date). And somehow, I managed to channel my Inner Therese Buckley (mom!) and found myself with a moment of crafty. I, yes, me, jenny martin – queen of the anticrafties – carved cucumbers and yellow peppers into little John Deere tractors. I made tractors out of vegetables!! Me!!

Maybe vegetable art can be my new therapy.