The time has come -- for professional therapy. And no, for once I'm neither kidding nor exaggerating. After months of debating and struggling, I have finally decided to start therapy. Everywhere that I've read about postpartum depression has strongly recommended that treatment really should be two parts: Anti-depressant drugs AND therapy. I don't have a real good reason that it's taken me so long to give in to the therapy side of things, but what's important is that I finally have made up my mind, and I'm THRILLED about it. I had a woman recently tell me (when explaining why therapy really is important) that OB's hand out anti-depressants like candy because depression obviously isn't their specialty. But once you're on the drugs and can at least think straight (better anyway), then you really need the therapy to work through all of the issues and emotions that you're still dealing with. And I'm definitely still dealing.

So, I finally came around and made the call. I found a therapist who specializes in pregnancy-related issues, postpartum depression, parenting and family life. I met Louise yesterday for my first-ever therapy session, and I was ridiculously excited! Let the healing begin. I realized, hello! Who wouldn't want to sit for an hour and talk about themselves?!! And FINALLY -- someone who takes notes when I'm talking!! I've been waiting for that for ages. Don't people realize that everything I say is worth writing down?! Well, thankfully, Louise gets it. And it's official now, I have a diagnosis and a treatment plan. Unfortunately the treatment plan doesn't involve a vacation to Hawaii and lots of dark chocolate, but it does involve a weekly trip to Louise (for a few months) and getting to talk about myself. I'll bring my own dark chocolate, but she at least provides the Kleenex.

Yesterday was a big day all around. I had my first therapy appointment and Matthew had his first ever trip to the dentist. The good news is that they had lots of toys and he got to watch some of CARS while they cleaned his teeth. The bad news is that the dental hygienist took one look at his mouth and said, "So, what' s his habit? Thumb sucker? Pacifier?" I responded, "Uh. No. It's a little bit weirder than that...See, Matthew has a special teddy bear 'Green Bear'. Matthew turns Green Bear over, smells the tag on the bear's butt (yes, it looks like he's smelling the bear's rear) while sucking his bottom lip -- his own that is, not Green Bear's bottom lip 'cuz, well, that'd be hard since Matthew's already smelling the bear's bum...uh...yeah." So, yes, the bottom lip part, that's where the dental issues come in to play. And here's what's worse, while he automatically does the bottom lip suckage the moment he has Green Bear (at nap time and bed time), he also does the infamous habit subconsciously -- while watching tv, playing, riding in the car, etc. The dentist took one look at him and said, "Yeah. That's a new one. Well, he's too young for orthodontia, but I imagine that as soon as he's old enough -- five or six -- they'll want to get an appliance in there to push out his bottom teeth so that they don't permanently affect the shape of his mouth, his adult teeth, etc. In the meantime, I'd try to get him to break the habit in the next six months." So, we some how get to break a habit that Matthew has literally been doing since day one. (We have a picture of him in the NICU on the 'tanning bed' -- jaundice therapy light bed -- wearing shades and sucking that bottom lip). AND we have a 3-D ultrasound picture of Zachary also sucking his bottom lip (although he has since developed an appetite for the flavor of thumb instead). Alas, forget about saving for college, we better just start saving for anti-bottom-lip-sucking-dental apparatuses or apparati, if you will. And while I'm in therapy, Matthew will start a teddy bear-butt-smelling-bottom-lip-sucking support group. Also known as Lip Suckers Anonymous.