It’s confession time. I’ve not been completely honest with you and now I’m ready to finally come clean. I’ve felt badly about it but we’ve both now decided that it’s for the best. Phew. Here goes: I’ve been cheating. I swear I didn’t mean to do it at first. I thought it would just be for fun. I just wanted to see what else was out there, and then, without meaning to I totally fell in love. Totally. Completely. Until death do us part. The One. I feel like I’ve betrayed so many people and will hurt so many people by doing this, but I just have to follow my gut. People have tried to intervene; they’ve tried to talk me out of it, but to no avail. And after a bit of time, Mike’s gotten used to the idea and also thinks it’s what we should do. It’s what’s best for our family.

We’re planning to move. See! I’ve been cheating on our wonderful, amazing, comfy-cozy house! And like all cheaters I will say (and this IS true) that I really wasn’t planning on doing it. I didn’t plan to find the absolute house of my dreams. I just hopped on-line one day just to, ya know, see what else is out there.

And there It was.

Honestly, I don’t know that it was completely love at first sight, but there was definitely an initial spark and a lot of curiosity on my end. How on earth is THAT house being sold for THAT price in THAT neighborhood? And then the doubt: There must be something totally wrong with it or it would’ve sold by now. It’s probably a cleaned up Meth Lab or maybe there was a quadruple murder there…

But I still didn’t care.

I showed the pictures to Mike and he humored me, thinking that it was just a passing phase. He ooed and ahhhed and then brought me back to reality, “Even though it’s a good price for that area, we could never afford it…and we love this house. We love everything about where we live. The boys are in a great school right now. Matthew’s finally got a really great teacher that he absolutely adores. We have awesome neighbors. The new library at the bottom of the hill will be open soon. We can walk to shops, restaurants and parks. I don’t have a super long commute to work…why would we move (even if we could afford it?)”

He’s right. Of course, he’s right. I do love (nearly) everything about where we’re at right now. But….but….it sure would be nice to be in the better school district come middle school. We’d be closer to church, Costco, Trader Joe’s, plenty of shopping. Unlike our current gym, the one out there is brand new and has a pool and basketball courts, a super awesome kids’ club. There’s a great community center with a preschool (for Kayliana eventually) and tons of programs for the kids. There’s a really good public pool for swimming lessons. Not to mention the fact that, oh, this house happens to be on a decent property backing to a state park and…did I mention it is my DREAM house? The kids would all have their own rooms. We’d have space for forever and would never outgrow it and…and…

Did I mention it’s on the very tippy top of a mountain?! The neighborhood is at about 1000 feet. We’d probably have our own weather system! Of course this would be a deterant to some, but apparently, unbeknownst to me, I’ve always wanted to live on the top of a mountain.

The first time I drove up to the house – just to see it in person – I knew. I had a feeling in my gut and a lightness in my head (not caused by elevation sickness). It wasn’t just that I could see us in that house. We are MEANT to live in that house. I see our kids growing up there and someday bringing their kids to see us there.

I watched the house on-line for about two weeks. Visiting the listing every day. I drove Mike up to the house after church one Sunday. He still hoped that it was a passing phase. He even offered to remodel our current kitchen or do SOMETHING to stay where we’re at. And again, it’s not that I don’t love where we’re at, it’s just, it’s just, it’s THE house.

I was trying to let the house go…I really was. But then a neighbor of ours who I hadn’t seen in a while and who happens to be a real estate agent, happened to be at the bus stop so I chatted him up briefly about this home. He, of course, offered to show it to us should I need to just “get it out of my system.” And, then, oh THEN, later that day I saw that the price had been dropped again making it a possibility. A real life possibility! So, then Mike agreed to humor me and go see it. And then we saw it. And then I mentally moved our furniture into every room. And then I was totally a goner.

Did I mention that the master bathroom and bedroom are spectacular?! And that the house is also my absolute dream layout? And that buying into that neighborhood at that price and with these current mortgage rates…well, we’d be stupid not to do it.

Yes, Mike will have a slightly longer commute (about 15 minutes each way), but he does have a telecommuting option (and he’ll probably start working from home one or two days a week). Yes, we will be giving up the ability to walk down to stores, a new library, restaurants, our favorite little produce stand and awesome parks. Yes, we’ll be a little farther from freeways and Seattle. We won’t be as centrally located. Yes, when it gets snowy or icey we will likely be trapped, stuck, secluded on the top of our mountain… But believe it or not, all of these things are what excite me about the house.

It’s just a LITTLE bit farther away – enough that we’ll plan ahead. And to me it’s not that we’d be stuck (OK, I recognize this is all rose-colored glasses right now, and cabin fever does eventually settle in), we’d be cozy. We’d hunker down in our little mountain top oasis and play board games and drink cocoa and watch movies and listen to Christmas music 24-7 / 365 and watch deer saunter across the yard. We might even see mountain lions and bears, oh my!

So, I love everything about this house, but….but…obviously we have to sell our current house first (right, details!), and that’s going to take a little time and prep work, not to mention that we’re getting into the hardest time of year for house selling – the holidays. This is a good thing and a bad thing for us. It means that the future Martin Mountain Manor will HOPEFULLY not sell and can wait for us until January (please, please, please, please, please…). It’s a good thing because at that point we may be able to get an even better price for the Mountain house. But it also means that it’s a HUGE gamble and we run the risk of someone else swooping in and getting the house (no, no, no, no, no, no, no…). In our favor: the house has been on the market for quite some time already. So, if it didn’t sell during the spring/summer, it’s very unlikely to sell during the winter when a.) not much sells and b.) who would be crazy enough to go house-hunting and then buy a house on the top of a mountain in the winter anyway?! (Oh right, us). Plus, it would be nice to have a couple more months financially, so we can save up and be prepared for this mondo-mega-monstruous purchase. However, waiting will possibly make selling our house harder too. Ahhh, the craziness!!

In the meantime, we’ll start getting things ready and enjoying every last moment in this house that we’ve loved so very much. Yes, it is just walls and a roof, but it’s been HOME. We’ve started a family here. I’ve rocked three babies to sleep in a certain chair in a certain room. I’ve painted nearly every wall. My garden was just becoming the whimsical sanctuary that I’ve been working towards. I’ll only have a few more months of running three mornings a week in the wee dark hours with Andrea – something I’ll miss beyond words. We’ll have our last Thanksgiving and our last Christmas in the house where our children celebrated their first Thanksgiving and their first Christmas. It will be so bittersweet but so exciting at the same time! Like everything with this decision, there are compromises and give and take. But I have no doubt that should it all work out – which I hope, I FEEL it will – it was all meant to be. I feel as sure about this house as I’ve only felt about two other things in my life: #1, that Mike was The One, and that #2, Mia was the birth mom for us and she just HAD to pick us (and she did!!!). Those two things both worked out pretty darn well if I do say so myself, and I pray that this is my big #3!!